When someone complains about other people showing them disrespect, and whines about how they're treated, then turns around and does the same exact thing to another person, the same thing they complained about, then I have no sympathy for them, and they've just lost all respect from me.
Well, maybe not all. After all, we are all people, living, feeling beings, and in that, we all deserve some degree of respect. After all, no one truly knows the experiences and the suffering another person has been through, and because they live, suffer, they deserve some respect.
Still, after all the time they spent complaining about how they're treated, only to turn around and treat another person exactly what they decried, what am I suppose to think? Or feel...?
To respect someone means you acknowledge someone or something has value. We may not always agree with it, but we must respect what it is that they say. Many times, we unfairly judge others or their views. We're insensitive to others' thoughts and feelings. We don't give them the time or attention they deserve. We may rudely interrupt or talk over them. We may begin to argue with them, negate their thoughts or opinions because we don't believe it, or refuse to listen to another side.
To simplify, to respect someone means you take their feelings, thoughts, needs, ideas, and preferences into consideration before we open our mouths (or use our fingers) in response to what was said or done. It means you value their thoughts and feelings, even if you don't agree with them, because we are entitled to our own thoughts, and feelings. It means being truthful, and accepting their differences.
And when you disrespect me, I'm sorry you felt you had to. I'm sorry your mental state was such that you had to sink to such lows. I forgive you, even if you don't ask for forgiveness.
But forgiving you doesn't mean I condone your actions. I can forgive someone & yet have nothing to do with them again. It doesn't mean I'm holding a grudge, it means I've forgiven & I've let go.
April 20, 2011
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